This is for the mama who’s out there, and she’s cherishing the mothering..yet, she also longs for days she won’t be tied down. You might know her? 🎭She’s fantastic, and she has a lot on her plate, too. She’s the greatest, and she’s spreading herself thin. She feels like there’s not a shoulder to lean on, despite how she always lends hers.
Things Will Be Fine, Mama. Things Will Be Just Fine.
My minds been sitting with this, for a little while, about how mothering can be such a fine line between loving, and barely liking the part. There’s times when the little ones just won’t go to bed, until we have to lay down the law for them, of course! But no matter how late they get down, they still gotta get up bright and early. And you? You’re just wondering if you can do this another day! Yeah, yeah, and you get it – the whole “embrace the time we get” rigmarole. I mean, hot damn, though!! You sure could use a week to yourself. (Does Starbucks have vacation packages?? I’m willing to beg!)
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Then, there’s times they turn in early (7:45 p.m. is lovely!), and you get to enjoy a glass of wine in peace. You can also text the one hundred and forty people you can’t seem to ever respond to; you can get your workout on, etc. Man, maybe you’ll even stay up all night, just to enjoy the feelings of rejuvenation! You find yourself thinking, “Damn I’m a pretty badass mama!”, while finishing that third (fourth?) glass of wine. Because, after all, the opportunity has presented itself – so by God, you’re going to take it! 🍷🍷🍷(🍷..)
Everything’s all over the place, a roller-coaster.
Everything has a way of making you feel bad, but then, you turn around and feel like a champ! It changes minute by minute. Everything’s exhausting you to death! Yet you always manage to gather the motivation to accomplish what’s needing to get done. You even manage to smile while doing it!
The fact is, there’s absolutely nothing to feel guilty about, for those moments you miss the glorious trips to the bathroom, all by your lonesome. In peace. I don’t remember those days very well! You see, my new normal is leaving the door open, in case she needs something. But it’s still a few minutes of stressing – “Is she opening the door to strangers? Oh my God, she’s being taken! And it was all due to me! Daydreaming a few minutes too long!” Ugh.
There’s also nothing wrong with seeing the fire truck when out driving and yelling “FIRE TRUCK!” (even if only in your mind), while she’s at school, visiting family, or somewhere besides in the car. Loony!
But, it’s not likely you’d be able to stop yourself, anyway. At least, not as long as the kid loves them dang emergency vehicles! So, it’s ok, mama.
There’s nothing to feel guilty about, for wishing you could spend the whole day in bed, and still jump at the sound of a small cough.
There’s nothing to feel guilty about on the times you insist on being stronger, either. And then you cave, yet again, to the lesser consequence for an action, simply because – another meltdown’s just way more than you can take!
There’s nothing to feel guilty about, for wishing you’d have the desire to beautify yourself more, but instead, reach for the sweatshirt..again!
However, it’s so not cool to talk down to yourself because you aren’t fitting into those size 6 jeans yet (even though you’d swear they should be going on comfortably by now).
There’s nothing to feel guilty about for picking up Starbucks almost everyday the last two weeks, rather than making a pot of coffee to drink by yourself – again. 🎟
Also, there’s nothing to feel guilty about when you pour bowls of cereal for the family’s supper, since there’s literally no motivation running through your body. At this point, you’re just kicking into survival mode till they’re asleep. Then you’ll be done for the day, so you can flip on the soaps and veg out in silence.
There’s nothing to feel guilty about, because you’re unsure if you can handle another piercing shriek in your ear. You’re also well aware (still) of how fast this age will go by.
There’s nothing to feel guilty about as you look around before bed, survey the damages in the living room, and decide to put off the housework, for just one more night. Because, we all know, 6 a.m. comes super quickly!
There’s also nothing to feel guilty about in taking opportunities for getting the house cleaner: the kitchen, and floors, etc. When this is your focus, the rest of the crew can handle their own meals or get something easy to put together. ✅Besides, you’re always in a little better mood after some housework has been accomplished. (Just a teensy bit!)
There’s nothing to feel guilty about when you need to get away from them all for an hour, but two seconds after you leave, you’re starting to mentally plan a trip to Disney World! Imagining them having the times of their life, while thinking, “Sigh. I don’t want them to grow up!!”
Womens Cotton Club Cutie Costume
There’s nothing to feel guilty about when you have that anxiety attack as someone’s offering that break. You’re just not sure how you’d feel about the kids wondering where their mama’s at, at bedtime. However, when they’re getting out of bed for the thousandth time, you can’t believe you were such an idiot, to not take some freedom when you had the chance. 🙅🏼
There’s nothing to feel guilty about for accepting who you’ve become, mama! This includes relying on your husband, more than your old #bosslady self ever would’ve.
All of a sudden, you’re back imagining that life of freedom again. Oh, the freedom you’d have! Things wouldn’t revolve around pretend play all the time. Yassss! (My thing’s this – why do I even have to do this?! To put it simply, the answer’s – cuz ya do.)
There’s nothing to feel guilty about, for imagining Jesus’s return frequently. Him taking you, so you can just be .
Be in His presence, and that’s it. Not always questioning your role..knowing you’ll have to change hats again at any given moment.
There’s nothing to feel guilty about, for needing a break from chasing your visions, and what you’re aspiring to accomplish for fulfilling your purpose – outside of being a mama, of course. But when you’re back reaching for that purpose – and you’ll be back – you’re well aware of how this precious family of yours has been the driving force to keep you reaching higher.
There’s nothing to feel guilty about, in just wanting to snuggle with your babies..instead of talking in those damn pretend voices for imagination time. In that moment, when your first grader wraps her arms around you to tell you “mommy, you’re the best”, all the guilt fades, right into love. Don’t you see? We don’t have to feel guilty. In those few seconds, when we’re enveloping their embrace, it can serve as our reminder, to simply just feel the love. 💫
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